Open letter: Dear social media feminists | OYA Magazine

Open letter: Dear social media feminists

By on January 31, 2017

By Oluwole Busayo

Dear social media feminists,

How are you? How’s the struggle to liberate the female folk from the chains of patriarchy?

You are doing a great job!

However, I have a few things to point out to you, to help further strength this movement.

1. If you are single and you are still using your father’s name as your surname, it’s time to replace it with your mum’s. Why should you be using a male’s name as your surname when in fact, you came out of your mum’s P. Please visit the nearest newspaper office to publish your change of name.

2. If you are married and you use your husband’s name as your surname. Please, that’s an insult to our noble movement. You’ll need to change your surname to your mum’s or just stick with your first name.

Why should you be using a man’s name as your surname? That’s part of the chauvinism we are fighting against. Your kids, too should use your first name as their surname. Not your husband’s. Your husband and a few nosy family members may want to fight you over this. Please, show them pepper and hold your ground. Your kids must use your first name as their surname. Period.

3. My dear, please make sure you share responsibilities, equally with your husband. Your kids’ tuition, clothing, feeding, house rent, chores. Everything. 50-50. It’s all about gender equality.

4. You’ll need to go back to your parents and demand a full refund of your brideprice(plus interests), and refund your husband. You cannot be bought! And please, don’t pay with your money, it was paid to your parents. So, you’ll need to get it back from them.

5. If you have a boyfriend and you’ll like to take things to the next level. Please, surprise him with a romantic engagement ring, with one knee on the floor plus a teary eye, plead with him to marry you. Stop hurting because he hasn’t proposed. My dear, Do it. You are a feminist.

6. If you are still single, I bet you know brideprice is a sacrilege, it is a mockery of the feminist movement. Do well to inform your parents beforehand, to forget about anything called brideprice. Tell them you aren’t ready to be sold. I hope you get my point.

7. You are a feminist and you don’t have a boyfriend yet. But there is one boy in your neighborhood that you like, please walk up to him and tell him how you feel about him. It doesn’t diminish your worth. Enough of the hypocrisy!

8. Please, stop being myopic in your campaign against cheating. Stop making it seem like a male thing. Cheating is not gender-specific. Who do men cheat with? For the straight folks, women. Speak against cheating, generally. Thank you.

9. Marriage is not an achievement. We all know that. But there are many women out there who would love to be married. Abeg, stop badmouthing marriage. You are victim of a broken relationship. I know it hurts, I sympathize with you. That it didn’t work out for you doesn’t mean it won’t work for someone else.

I believe these highlighted points if implemented, will help strengthen this awesome movement and make our voices louder.

Yours in struggle,

PS. If you have other vital suggestions you would like to give to our fellow comrades, please share in the comments.

Thanks you!!!
Cc:
Noble M. K. Eyinfunjowo
Sulaiman Wasiu Olalekan Leewas
Dara Adenekan
Ayòdélé Eagles Ìbíyemí
Afolarin John Damilola

Photo credit: awjingyi

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